Ever notice how when you expect the worst, it somehow shows up? That’s no coincidence.
We’ve all been there—todos nosotros—caught in a loop where life feels heavy, people seem distant, and nothing goes quite right. It makes you wonder: is life really this hard, or am I seeing it through a lens that’s coloring everything?
That’s where confirmation bias and profecía autocumplida (self-fulfilling prophecy) come in. What we believe, we tend to notice. What we expect, we often create. These aren’t just psychological terms—they’re experiences we live daily, no matter our age or situation.
Think about a child who believes they’re “bad at math.” They stop trying, avoid asking questions, and sure enough, they stay stuck. The belief shapes their actions—and the outcome follows.
Now picture a young adult who thinks, “I’m not lovable.” That belief shows up in their relationships—they might hold back, doubt themselves, or wind up in unfulfilling relationships. They may not only doubt they can receive love but also hesitate to give it freely, afraid it won’t be returned. When love doesn’t come, the belief feels confirmed. But when someone begins to trust, “I am worthy of love—and I can give it openly,” their whole approach changes. They invite connection—and love follows. Belief shapes experience.
It’s no different in midlife. Someone might tell themselves, “It’s too late to start over.” That mindset keeps them from exploring new paths—and the door they never tried to open stays closed.
Perspective really is everything. Imagine walking into a room thinking, “People are against me.” You act guarded, people sense it, and the experience matches your expectation. Now imagine walking in with, “We all want to succeed together.” You’re more open, people respond in kind, and connection grows.
For me, shifting perspective starts with curiosidad. Curiosity helps me pause and ask, “Is this the only way to see this?” It allows me to approach life in a more empirical way—observing what’s actually happening instead of clinging to assumptions. Curiosity creates space for descubrimiento—discovery—and quiets the inner critic that feeds bias.
It’s not easy—claro que no. Changing how we see the world takes practice, and how you shift will be unique to you. But it starts with awareness.
Ask yourself: “If I see this through a positive lens, what might happen? If I stay in a negative one, what’s the cost?” That simple shift in awareness can change everything.
If you’re feeling ready—or even just curious—about how to shift your perspective and build beliefs that truly serve you, let’s connect. A confidential coaching partnership could be a powerful step.
Coaching for Hispanic Men
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